Teach your daughters to be intimidating in a pretty dress

25 Apr

I am actually ecstatic that I have daughters to raise, and I want to pass along some of our vision for raising them for God.From the time Carrianna was a baby, I have been reciting to her Proverbs 31 – as I change her diaper, get her dressed, do the dishes with her, hold her on the couch, driving her in the car.It’s the nasty men who are more likely to be holding candy and luring us into their van.This is my earliest memory of the “strange men are dangerous” rhetoric.In other words, they expect to handle conflict with relational aggression — while boys associate physical aggression with being male. D., author of and a longtime psychologist, sees social behaviors in elementary-age girls that used to begin in middle school.Around second grade, this kind of behavior becomes more sophisticated, and teachers begin to see it in the classroom. Both biology and evolving cultural patterns are contributing to these changes, she says, through earlier physical maturity, exposure to media that portrays relational aggression, more marketing to younger girls and more pressure to achieve academically.While I am no professional sociologist, it seems to me that there is a rather strong correlation between the decline of fathers in the home and the rise of immodesty among women. There is also a deep desire to simply and truly be the beauty, and be delighted in.

Apparently two small groups had volleyed glares that felt intimidating to younger children. When my daughter arrived home, I said, “Sounds like school was a little rough today.” She burst into tears. Most parents associate girl conflicts — and mean-girl tactics — with the middle school years.

You might think I’m not qualified to write about this subject, seeing as my own daughter is only three years old.

Surprisingly, though, I have already had quite a few conversations come up with my daughter.

A 2010 study from the State University of New York at Buffalo of children ages 3–12 found that some girls understand relationally aggressive tactics as early as preschool.

It also reports that girls associate these tactics with being a girl.